Which do you prefer........

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's
Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't
taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home
from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did
something wrong.

Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he
sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side
table. And, next to them, a single red rose! ! Jack sits up and sees
his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around
the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is
the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring
ba ck at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on
the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a
kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:

'Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to
make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love,
Jillian'

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast,
steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at
the table, eating.
Jack asks, 'Son... what happened last night?'

'Well, you came home after 3 A.M. , drunk and out of your mind. You
fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the
hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.'

Confused, he asked his son, 'So, why is everything in such perfect
order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table
waiting for me??'
His son replies, 'Oh THAT!... Mum dragged you to the bedroom, and
when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed

'Leave me alone, I'm married!!'

Broken Coffee Table £239.99
Hot Breakfast £4.20
Two Aspirins £0.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time . .. PRICELESS

or do you prefer....

Son asked his mother the following question:

'Mum, why are wedding dresses white?' The mother looks at her son and replies, 'Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure.'

The son thanks his Mom and goes off to double-check this with his father.

'Dad why are wedding dresses white?'

The father looks at his son in surprise and says, 'Son, all household appliances come in white.'