Monday, January 26, 2009

There must be a better way

I am not a fan of these automated call centres. With the recent problems with the internet and the boiler I have had to use these lately.

My upstairs phone is an old one and modern IVR's don't recognize when I press a button so if I want to be on the PC as well I have to bring the donwstairs phone upstairs.

Anyway a typical IVR goes something like this.

This call is being recorded for training, and 4000 other reasons which we will tell you about before we let you proceed.

Press 1 if you are opening a new account
press 2 if you wish to request some literature
press 3 if you want make a payement
Press 4 if you have a problem or need to talk to somebody

you then get ANOTHER set of options

THEN you will be asked (if you are lucky and don't get another set of options)

after the tone say your name

if you are lucky they'll recognize your name

after the tone say your postcode

after the tone say your date of birth

using your phone enter your account number followed by the hash key.

after the say tell us your inside leg measurement

now without revealing your password.......

EVENTUALLY you'll here the phrase

"thank you we are transferring you to an operator"

you'll then hear the original greeting and then be told that all operators are busy as they are experiencing unusual demands (WHY IS IT AT WHATEVER TIME YOU ARE RINGING EVERY EFFING COMPANY IS EXPERIENCING UNUSUAL DEMANDS??)

after 10 minutes of being told "all our operators are busy as we are experiencing unusual demands" and get the odd sales message you'll
a) feel like you want to scream at the phone (I often do)
and
b) talk to some poor sod who has had a bad day because he has had a load of fed up customers like you!!

And you know what? He'll take you through the same set of EFFING questions you've already answerd.

One day I'll meet a company that has enough people to answer the phone and doesn't make me want to drive down and hit the head of customer sales and marketing with a large brick.

6 comments:

oldcrow61 said...

Maddening, isn't it!

Eagleseagles said...

So well put!
I feel exactly the same - except I'll add those phone calls from the call centres trying to sell you something............argggggghhhh!

I am now going to pick up the phone AND Ggo right through wiyth acall and listen to it and then tell them when they think they have me on a hook...NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
C

Jan said...

Lol. You forgot to add that if it's BT you can't understand a word of what they say when you do eventually get to speak to someone, because they are Indian. Or if it's Sky Digital, because they are Scottish!

The Quacks of Life said...

in fairness Jan the indian guy spoke excellent English.

ST said...

Had a bad day?

The Quacks of Life said...

that day? no! thursday!

Blog Status

If you want to use any photos on this blog please see this link.