Adam Slavick-Lennard keeps his wife awake at night by talking in his sleep. His wife was more amused than annoyed because what he says is rather funny. She has recorded what he says and there is a blog.
The top 10 sayings are:
10: I don't want to die! I love sex. And furry animals
9: Butter... nut... squash. I like those words
8: You're pretty. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty [long pause]... Now f*** off and be pretty somewhere else. I'm bored
7: Don't leave the duck there. It's totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it'll have much more fun.
6: Ooh! My balls are itchy. Have you got the cheese grater?
5: I've got a badger, a dog, a cat and a sack
4: I can't believe in God when I'm THIS good!
3: Avocados? You can shove them up your a*** as well
2: Since when did my underwear look good on you? Take it off. Take it off your face
1: Pork chops are most satisfying. Mmmmmm. Dangle them from the ceiling